Saturday, February 24, 2001
I should be asleep. I have school tommorow. I havent done my homework yet, and it is really late. This seems to be a recouring pattern with me. I wonder what it means. Perhaps it shows that im lazy. Maybe it shows that im sick of school. Or not. who knows the reasons I do things, I just do them.
I love eating food. It is so much more than simple nourishment. It tastes good, it is something fun to do while you are bored, and it can help lift your mood. If i had to be a cow and eat grass life would be so much less satisfying.
Tuesday, February 20, 2001
Im tired. I am not thinking staight. It is late I should be asleep, but I dont want to sleep. I want to be awake, awake from my life that sometimes seems like a dream. I am asleep and I am tired. Or I am tired of being asleep .hehe this makes no sense, I cant articulate my thoughts - they seem so vague and indescribable. Sometimes people say that I can seem "out of it," but being out of it is being into it when "it" is the seemingly unreal reality in which I exist and when I am "out" of "it" I am in the real reality, or is it real, or is all in my head. Sometimes nothing seems real, and yet I just go on living in the world, and at times when I have thoughts like this I begin to question what I do. Oh well I just keep on doing it, and things usually end up right. or do they...
My mp3 player is broken. It surprises me how much music can relax you - or simply amplify any emotions that you are feeling. I feel somewhat murky without that constant music source by my side. Oh well I'll manage.
Monday, February 19, 2001
I often think about things, and than feel like writing down my thoughts. For many, a journal can serve this purpose, but the idea of a journal to me is unappealing - im not sure why, perhaps it has something to do with their seclusive nature. So, instead I have created this blog to serve as a record of my thoughts, a place where I write down any sort of obscure ideas that I feel like expessing. Feel free to check it every now and then to see what I have to say.